Why I am alive and others are not, why Becky is not, I do not know. Becky taught me the importance of humor, humility, to care and have concern for others in spite of pain, and above all, to continue to love. In hindsight, at each step my life was blessed with signs that gave me strength.

Against my doctor's advice, but keeping my promise to Becky, I enrolled in a nursing program at NY University. After nine years teaching full time, attending classes nights and weekends, and raising my children, I graduated with a BSRN and specialized in oncology, the treatment of cancer. My first nursing job was at Memorial Sloan Kettering Cancer Institute, seven years on a hematology oncology unit. During this time I visited Haiti each year as a volunteer nurse in a mountain clinic caring for natives with TB and AIDS. As a professional camel trainer, on separate trips I walked across the Great Victoria and Simpson Deserts of Australia with 17 camels; the second trip with my children, ages 8 and 11. I was a six-time marathon runner, botany student at Brooklyn Botanical Garden, and part time professional gardener for the city of New York.

The lure of green, mountains, a slower pace, and family led me west again, where I became theMedical-Oncology Education Coordinator at a hospital serving southern Oregon and northern California. After four years of hospital and community oncology education, I sought a change.